For anyone that has been trying to get a formula field to ACTUALLY substitute line feeds, carriage returns, and paragraphs here is a solution I (slowly) figured out.
Use the following formula to URL encode the text, and then substitute the other stuff you do want back in. Despite all of the suggestions I saw in here, you can’t substitute the \n with anything because airtable just adds it back in.
SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(SUBSTITUTE(ENCODE_URL_COMPONENT({Your Field}),"%20"," “),”%3F","?"),"%0D"," “),”%0A"," “),”%3A",":"),"%2F","/"),"%21","!"),"%2C",","),"%3B",";"),"%27","’")
If there are still some encoded characters showing up, just go here to grab it and wrap it again with another substitution.
If anyone has a better solution, lemme know.
DON’T SAY I NEVER DID ANYTHING FOR YOU!